[A Story] Ch. 4 Not So Interesting Life

Finally, after 1 week of searching for a job, he finally landed a good and exciting job. He is now working in the B city, where you can find the tallest blue and silver buildings. Almost every building in this city has a small shopping center.

He also found a place to live in. He is staying in a small apartment in a small town in G city. It takes only 5 minutes to reach his office from his home. He is so happy that he found this place because there are some parks where he can breathe fresh air. Below is his daily routine.

8:00 – wake up and prepare for work
8:55 – travel from home to office
9:00 – open my computer and think what I should do for the day
12:00 - lunch break
12:30 – continue working
3:00 – take off from work and go to the gym/or roller blading
5:00 – relax and rest
6:00 – prepare and cook dinner
7:00 – dinner while watching TV
8:30 – surf the net and play computer games/watch or dvd/tv series.
11:00 – go to bed and sleep.

One boring night, around 8:30PM, Ryan starts reminiscing the old days. He started remembering those unhappy days in his childhood. He used to play with his neighbors. Most of the time, he always get himself into a fight. The reason is he thought that his opponents don’t play fairly. At that point, he started to become a home and school loner. At home, he either study or play computer games. He goes to school and then go straight to home.

But on his 5th grade, something has changed his life. It was the time when he was supposed to be a contestant of a mathematics competition but he was never selected because he thought that competition was in the afternoon. At that moment, he went home frustrated and cried a lot. That is the turning point during his grade school days. He persevered and started to achieve his goals. He started competing in competitions not only in Mathematics but also in other subjects. He began to gain self-confidence. He became sociable by joining several school organizations. With this, he became famous and started to have some kind of appeal towards the opposite sex.

He remembers the girl who caught his heart. At first, he heard from his classmates that this girl liked him. So, out of curiosity, he made a move towards this girl even though she has an on and off relationship with this handsome but stupid guy. He wondered why this girl is so famous and many boys have a crush on her. So, when he started to court her, he found out that her internal beauty makes so attractive. For him, she was just an ordinary girl who possesses a great smile and kind heart. He remembered that they always talking on the phone for more than 2 hours. Ryan will always give her 3 small chocolate bars (examples are those chocnut, goya chocolates bars and cloud 9). Debbie, the girl, usually appreciates this even though it only cost a peso at that time that was a big “pogi” points. She chose a song for them, “Too Many Walls” because she felt that there are many people tearing them apart. At first, those people were unsuccessful because of the puppy love enveloping the Debbie and Ryan’s hearts. They like each other so much that no one could ever break them up except themselves. Unfortunately, it did, Debbie began to dislike Ryan because he became boastful and over-confident with himself. Just after a few months they broke up. Ryan’s life was devastated at that time. He became thinner and duller because he couldn’t eat and sleep. He always thinks what he had done and what he should have done to stay with her.

After a few months, he recovered from love sickness or should we say infatuation sickness. He wondered if he should have just focused on the other girl, Chichi, instead. Chichi was his all time crush among his crushes because he began liking this girl since kindergarden. But on the fifth grade, she left the school and moved to another place far from the city where Ryan lives. In that year, before Ryan courted Debbie, he was beginning to make a move by going to her house (which is near the school) after class. He remembers the days when they were playing “piko”. He imagines her smile, her red lips, her fair skin, her red ribbon. He sighed and asked himself, why he didn’t write her a letter to see how she is? Now, it was too late. Ryan came to know that she is already married. At this moment, there is nothing he can do. He wonders what if he followed her and confessed his feelings.

When he went to high school, he continued to pursue the profound feeling of tender affection for or intense attraction to another person of the opposite sex *. He tried to change to a better person, to be a humble person instead a boastful person that people hates. Every year he always meets someone special. To please this special person, he always starts to give her love letters and then gifts (usually stuff toy) on special occasions. Most of the time, it never last because there are no communications and no connections. It was just an infatuation. But there was this girl that he will never forget. Her name is Jean, a typical girl with beauty and brains. She has a beautiful smile and eyes that will melt you down if you see it. She is a girl who possesses a strong charm and appeal towards boys. She can dance and shake her booty very well. One day, he asked her to go to the creek in school. His intention is to ask her to the prom but without knowing, he confessed his feelings for her. He touched her so that he can see her beautiful face. He tickled her to make her smile. He looked to her charming eyes to see some answers. She just smiled but Ryan didn’t know what was going to her mind.

After that, things have changed. Jean began to avoid Ryan. She felt uneasiness every time he approaches her. She rejected him when he asked her to dance in the prom and Christmas party.

At this point, Ryan stopped thinking. He doesn’t want to remember the unhappy days. He closes his eyes for a minute and thinks nothing. Suddenly, he heard a voice…and then 2, 3 or 4 more voices. Some are saying “you should start as friends first”. Some whispered, “You should always be there for her, be confident and be yourself”. Some said, “You must get into her comfort zone first before you confess”. I listened to them but I forget. That’s what Ryan told himself. With a sudden outburst, he punched his bed and prayed to God, “Why people that I loved most, don’t love me back. Why is it hard to find that someone who will make your life colorful? My life is so boring. What I am going to do. Please give me some directions. Please…please please give me a guardian angel. Thanks.”